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Kimberly Simon Hypnotherapy & Wellness

Kimberly Simon Hypnotherapy & Wellness • December 25, 2020

Three Steps to Happy Healthy Love 

 Love is the highest vibrational feeling. 
 Most sought, is romantic love.

But seeking to receive love is the last step of creating healthy happy love in your life. Doing the seeking before the other 2 steps often brings disappointment in the quality or amount of love in your life. We desire an enduring powerful non selfish all accepting love. And what we receive is far short of that. So let’s start at the beginning…
 
Step 1…Loving yourself first...

The Law of Love Correspondence: The quality & quantity of the love you receive corresponds to the quality & quantity of love in your subconscious thoughts & feelings about yourself.
 
I often hear people saying about a past relationship, 'I gave every bit I had until I was empty.' That is true, because your own self-love was limited, you drew to yourself someone else with low self love. In trying to fill them up, you emptied yourself. 

When 2 people full of self-love, respect and esteem connect, love never runs empty. 

The poem below is often read in terms of a relationship. But read it anew applying it to yourself...


Self-esteem is built daily in your thought’s words and actions. You love or disdain yourself through thoughts & actions in mind, body, or spirit. Self esteem is built not through mechanically saying affirmations of self-love, but also backing them up with the actions.

People often are better at how they showing love to others than themselves even though they run dry. Take for instance a baby. In nurturing an infant shows great care in choosing nutrients and quality food. Time is taken to tenderly administer nutrition from pre-natal vitamins, to breastmilk, organic baby food, to beautifully made lunches with messages of love…

And how do you treat your own body with love nutritionally? Do you baby it, nurture, feed it with loving care, administer love to yourself with tenderness and attention? Do you repeat loving messages to yourself before a meal? Think of how you nourish the mind, body, and spirit of a child. wouldn't you do a better job of it if you knew how to do so by practicing on yourself first? Imagine the wisdom and power you could pass on to others if you taught from a place of experience.
 

How do you feel when you read words of loving yourself deeply and fully?
If you feel uncomfortable and selfish you may have some work to do on loving yourself. 



The second step...Send love out...


Love is not determined by social norms. You can love nature, people, children, family, God, social causes, the arts… and you can send it out through prayer, random acts of kindness, volunteering, gift giving, touch, words, creating, serving, healing, teaching, parenting…why put limits on love when it is the most important thing you can do in your life.


Experience love wherever and whenever you can!


Time expectations also cannot be applied to love – love of nature can be felt by watching a sunset …over a lifelong family relationship with a sibling, a 1 month friendship, or a 30-year marriage.


Applying time requirements, ritual expectations to the worthiness of love limits how much love

you can experience.


Loving your own circle of friends and family is easy, but the greatest love is to grow your love bubble to encompass an ever-growing array of life. Send love to strangers in faraway places.


When you love yourself completely, you have enough love to share with people near or far, difficult or easy, and strangers or the hardest family members to get a long with. 




3rd step… receiving love with an open heart…


Once you love yourself and others, by Law of Love Correspondence, you will draw high quality

love in return.

The trick is accepting it without judgement. Every relationship is an agreement between 2 people learning from each other what needs to improve within themselves by what is instigated, triggered, or encountered. Whether, friend, lover, sister, employer, or spouse - the counter to you in any encounter serves as a mirror to reflect who you are and what you need to improve in yourself.
 

You cannot accept the fun aspects of a relationship without also accepting the lessons gained by the encounter. You were magnetically drawn to each other for a purpose of growth. Look in the mirror and love what looks back to you in the encounter as much as you have learned to love yourself.


Therefore, once in a relationship try not to “should” all over people. What YOU believe people “should” do is a judgement and not necessarily true.

When you feel a "should judgement" rising within... Regardless of whether someone "should have" done or said something, rid yourself of annoyance or animosity, forgive and move on. Whatever they did or not did not do was a gift sent to you to learn from.

 

You cannot control the actions of others, but you can control your own thoughts & actions.



That brings us to the mediation/hypnotherapy home practice

for this blog.


It begins with a common tools to relax your body. When you are relaxed you will be asked to visualize and repeat aloud suggestions for love and compassion within yourself and for others. A count out will finish the session in which you can end gently at any time by counting up from 1 to 5.


Here is the link for you to listen and practice:


Be sure not to listen to while operating machinery or sitting in a rolling chair. Listen daily in a comfortable upright position with your spine straight and chin level with the ground for 18 minutes. 

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Before beginning my journey into hypnotherapy... I led meditation training, yoga classes and yoga therapy while practicing as a Massage Therapist through ayurvedic philosophy. I was trained by a brilliant Hatha teacher that focused on the foundation of yoga as much as the Asana. After yoga training I was led to become a Teacher of Mantra and trained with the Nama Deva Archarya. I discovered Paramhansa Yogananda at the same time and began the SRF teachings that eventually led to my Kriya Yoga Practice. I decided to align my massage practice with my yogic philosophy by studying the David Frawley Ayurvedic Lifestyle Certification Training. 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Charya is Karma yoga” …Hypnotherapy helps to bring awareness of karmic patterns and make a break from self-defeating thoughts and habits to clear the road for healthy karma and habits. “Then Kriya is experienced. Kriya is bhakti yoga. Once bhakti yoga has melted the heart, then the deep yoga concepts and meditation techniques of raja yoga may be practiced. They are to be understood within the internal mind, not just memorized. The wise guru will never teach deep meditation techniques to angry, jealous, fearful devotees…” ….Hypnotherapy helps to bring awareness to unhealthy emotions and dissolve them creating the opportunity to feel love and connection with others beginning the path towards union with all. Lesson 142: “Many Hindu teachers in the West teach purely Advaitic meditation, with no theism or religious practice, but most who have come to the West from India were raised in Hindu homes. They have within them a firm religious, cultural foundation for yoga. Many do not pass the religious culture on to their Western devotees. In an orthodox Hindu community they would most likely teach in a more traditional way. Advaita philosophy is appealing to the Westerner. It does not require a change in lifestyle. The nondual, Advaita-based meditations do bring the devotees out of the conscious mind, but often lead them into the subconscious. It is here, within the subconscious, that unresolved problems with family and one’s own personal ego begin to appear. Without a proper religious-cultural background and traditional Hindu belief system, these problems are difficult to handle. This turmoil is certainly not the purpose of Advaitic meditation, but it is a by-product.” …Hypnotherapy helps to adjust subconscious programming, developed before the age of 11 years old in Western homes. 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The best way to achieve world change is to achieve it in your own life first. Imagine sense and feel that you are king or queen of your castle and kingdom. What is it like right now? How would your perfect kingdom look? Create the atmosphere of your kingdom this season by deciding the rules and values that you will live. What is the one attribute that you need to create your envisioned world? When you were young, did you have posters of singers, actors, or super-heroes? As you got older, you idolized the older kids, the “cool crowd”, great athletes or peers with the greatest clothes or look. When you began seeking your place in the world, you admired people that did well financially, academically, or professionally. Eventually you chose the people who would provide you with the relationship, children, family, and friend set that you thought was ideal. Earlier or later most of you eventually decided that you needed something greater to emulate and turned to religion. The God entity you aspire to is a version of perfection. Inevitably this perfection is impossible to emulate, you fall short and decide to settle for being human and just worship it instead. I propose that this season you become a kid again and choose a role model. Instead of trying to emulate a whole being or person, choose just one attribute. 1. What do you need to acquire as a super-power attribute or ability this holiday season? 2. What or why will you need or apply it? Here is a list of options to get you thinking… • Patience when others lose their own • Tolerance for other’s beliefs • Perseverance for workload of cooking, shopping, cleaning, decorating, visiting • Ability to create boundaries and stay by them when your own personal emotional, mental health is at risk. • Ability to harness you animal instincts and addictions • Ability to harness your ever-increasing need for more • Ability to create abundance for your family or provide food on the table • To bring love in your heart for your yourself or fellow human. • To accept the things you cannot change, change yourself, or let it go • Strength to not give up your own integrity in the face of adversity • Ability to only participate in conversation that builds people up or inspires. • The ability to make people laugh or bring joy into a room. • To bring comfort to those with less or are grieving this season. 3. Now, create the rules and foundation for your kingdom to help achieve your attribute. What citizens can live in your kingdom? Who will you invite into your kingdom? If you only invite people reflective of who you are right now, you will remain stagnate. Invite those that will challenge, inspire, motivate, and teach you. Surround yourself with people who reflect the way you want be, energies are contagious. Surround yourself with people who have the habits you want to have, and you will become more like them. You are as good as the people who you surround yourself with - let go of those that hold you back. 4. Now choose one person to be your role model. Seek people with traits you aspire to- not things you aspire to. Wealth is fine , but wealth does not define character, it only defines how nice their couch is. How did they get that nice couch? Search past the surface and material side of people and investigate their values. How do you determine someone’s values? By not only what they say, but does how they live reflect their beliefs? Some people are excellent word smiths. They are rich in saying the right words, but they do not practice what they preach. Be careful determining values by labels, titles, or looks…dig deeper…read what they have said. Have they stayed true to their beliefs for a long span of time or are they one hit wonders? You want to find someone that shows a trait over a long span of time because people can look like they hold a value for a photo. Those that really hold a value, hold it whether things are good or bad, high or low, or thick or thin. An attribute expert should be consistent in their trait. Is it alright to use spiritual or religious icons, deities, or gurus? Yes! As long as you are not trying to model the full perfection of their being. Focus on one attribute. 5. Next…Practice using the attributes in your mind using your original reason for choosing it. Imagine, sense and feel yourself embodying those attributes while playing out scenarios in your mind. 6. Finally, more and more infuse your attribute in everyday challenges. Fake it until you make it. The second you decide to work on an aspect of your being the universe sends lessons , opportunities, or challenges to give you a chance to try your new skills. Sometimes you will fail- that is okay! You will succeed more times than if you had never attempted at all. Additionally, you have made your kingdom a better place for doing so. When you have made your own little neck of the woods a better place, you have improved the world for the better. Here are some questions to help you create your holiday kingdom atmosphere… What attribute do you most need for this season? What are the situations, reason, or challenge, you will apply your attribute to? Is there anyone in your kingdom that is limiting or hindering your attempt to acquire that attribute? Can you limit your interactions with this person in anyway or create an emotional boundary decision to not allow this person to interfere with your attribute plans? Who can you invite into your kingdom to surround yourself with those attributes? Consider: books, video’s, images, and virtual items that reflect the attribute if people aren’t available. Choose a role model. Is there anyone in your current kingdom that holds the attributes that you desire that you can emulate? If there is not, is there any live, dead, or spiritual resource in the form of animal, angel, historic figure, guru, guide that you can think of that has this attribute? Create an “I am” statement for yourself to say as a mantra when you need to remind yourself that you have this attribute. Example: I am abundant, I am patient, I am compassionate, I am __________________ Imagine, sense, and feel a scene or situation that most challenges this attribute and practice seeing yourself navigate the situation successfully. Notice how you feel when you have done so successfully. I feel __________________ Add this to the affirmation’s you use when your holiday challenges arise.
By Kimberly Simon August 29, 2020
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